lego mini figure on white table


The Coronavirus is causing havoc all over the world infecting over 150,000 people and killing thousands. It has the potential to wipe out TRILLIONS from the economy which is rippling fear amongst the masses and causing a shortage in supplies due to everyone stockpiling goods. Apart from overdosing on hand sanitiser, buying masks, cleaning products and washing your hands repeatedly – what can you do when the media is pushing everyone into a lock-down but nothing is left in Tescos apart from walnuts?

If you feel sick, fluey or are known to be vulnerable, at-risk, or have a weak immune system then PLEASE STAY AT HOME for 7 days to limit transmission. If symptoms persist call 111. More info here

I ran out of toilet paper and went to the supermarket to buy some loo roll. LOW AND BEHOLD the entire rack was wiped out. Nada. I went again today, into all the stores I could think of and same again. I ended up having to buy the only thing that was left: biodegradable wet wipes lol. There’s 75 in there so that means I am able to take a dump hopefully around 30 times? Two-wipe poos right?

Tesco’s Tissue Issue

Reasons why there’s a toilet roll shortage.

I felt so sad there was no oat milk, rice, pasta, cans or noodles left – then I took a step back and was like WTF do I even need oat milk? It made me think about this spoilt 1st world life we’ve been living in and I started to get scared of oat milk shortages, having to hold in my poos and having to think of alternatives when I wasn’t even planning on stockpiling, to begin with 😭

Here are some tips me and a couple of friends have gathered in hope to soothe your anxieties, so we can work around shortages, chuckle, look at this experience and problem solve and get judged.

What to do we do when we run out of toilet paper when you pee/poo?

Re-use cotton rags from old t-shirts

Pee WHILST showering

Use shower head to wash your goods if you don’t have a bidet

Or use a spray bottle

Or use these scoop things. Fill with water and wash your foo.

Go plant-based


Buy kitchen roll and cut in half 😂

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I got your quirky quarantine hacks boos, we got this

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Save and re-use the cardboard tubes, newspaper, any papers!! If you get desperate

Beware of alternatives that can clog your toilets!


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